My Only Regret
by emikoai.hatchio
Summary: So many regrets Mikan never made, even though she had so many hardships she had to take, so many tortured days she had to spend, so many deaths she had to witness, and so many smiles she had to give away but were never returned, and still she never regretted anything, until that one fateful day her so-called 'family' did to her, made her regret everything...
1. Prologue

**MY ONLY REGRET**

**A/N: Hi, I know I haven't updated my other fics, well, let's just say that I had many, and when I say many, I mean many things in school, so many assignments, studies, and etc.**

**So this is my new fanfiction for Gakuen Alice. I'll tell you something, not even my **_**'partner in crime' **_**knows, but ever since I was just 6, I loved imagining the impossible. I know it's normal for little kids, but what I imagined was very, and I mean (A/N: I really like that expression "And I mean", hehehehe) very different for little kids, I imagined about vampires, ghosts, werewolves, "multos", zombies, and many more non-real stuff. I would always, for some reason, make the lead character a girl with brown hair and brown chocolate eyes. I don't know why, but yeah…I loved and hated brown, I loved it because of my main character but, I hated it, because of a very childish reason that was the color of my skin. I wanted so badly to have white skin, but the world can be so unfair, so yeah.**

**The reason why I'm going to finally write this is because I was reading a fanfiction made by Hylindril, an author for twilight. I always like a story if the girl dies, and her mate suffers, when the girl is the most powerful of all, and when the girl is betrayed, etc… In this case, this fanfic will be about the second I have just mentioned. Back to the topic, while I was reading one of her fanfics I remembered reading last year, It made me feel confident for some reason, so that's the reason why I'm doing this…**

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PROLOGUE

**YEAR 500 B.C.**

**THIRD PERSON POV**

It was a rainy day in Emtoile City. Unbelievable as it seems but this is the first time it has rained in Emtoile city for the past 500 years, it was always so sunny, but the sky knows why it needs to rain, because today, the first ever Univ War is going to happen. But lucky for the Emtoile city and their kind, that queen to guide them to victory as they would say. But they didn't know that their only hope was actually nine months pregnant and due any moment now.

**? POV**

"Mommy, Mommy when is the baby going to be born?" I asked Mommy…

"Soon, Misaki , soon…" Mommy told me with a happy, relieved, and worried kind of smile …

"Really? Yay,Yay…." I said as I twirled Mommy around, I'll just ignore it this time….

"Misaki, be careful with mom, remember she's going to have the baby due not long from now, and for once act your age…" Serene-neesama told me. I groaned… Just because I was 350 years old didn't mean I couldn't call mom Mommy anymore….

"Really now, You have no right to say that to me Miss I-hate-the-weather-because-I-couldn't-go-on-my-date, how 'bout you grow up Serene-neesama… Don't be so grumpy because you couldn't go on your date. It won't be the end of the world just because you couldn't go on your date with Moku." I said back

"One, His name is Akira, which is very far from _Moku_, Second, your just jealous I'm going out with somebody already, Third, I am acting my age, I'm acting just like a 353 years old, unlike you who couldn't even sleep without your little bear _Romi-chan_…." Serene-neesama talked back…

"Why I should-"I was about to jump on Serene-neesama, when I was blocked by a shield…

"Guys, stop fighting, I don't want our youngest to be just like you idiots, Go do different stuff, like train for the upcoming war." Akira said… then he left.

I and Serene-neesama looked at each other, and just sighed. True though, I looked back and saw that Mom wasn't here anymore. I sniffed for a few times, and then I smelt her. Mom was at the garden where she and Dad would always go to every night… My Mom was Yukari Hinamiro and My Dad by the way is Izuki Hinamiro…

She really does miss him. I heard her sigh, and a small whimper crossed her lips. It's been 2 months since Dad died, because of those stupid Devils.

I pity Mom. Mom and Dad were actually childhood friends. Dad was the cold-hearted one, handsome, smart one and Mom was the kind, klutzy, gorgeous, yet dumb one, yet they still fell in love. Dad only showed his 'good-side' only to Mom, and us, his children. Sometimes, even only to Mom. They became fiancé's when they were just nine years old. They got married at the age of twelve years old. I know they were young, but for some reason, when Dad was just one year old and 3 months, he already had an I.Q. of 660, and Mom had and I.Q. of 350…don't ask me why she became like **that** but yeah, they were young, pre-teens falling in love, that's normal…right?

"Sigh… I just wish, nothing bad will happen to anyone in our family anymore… I won't be able to take it if anyone of us dies, I just wouldn't…"

I was walking along our castle, not minding anything, when I suddenly bumped into someone and fell flat on my butt…

"Gomen, I wasn't looking." I said as I was apologizing… Well at least I was, until I knew who I had bumped into. It was Zane, along with Ferris, Lucy, and Maria.

"No problem, just be more careful next time" Zane said as he walked passed me with the others.

As I was walking through the hall, thinking of some possible tactics for the Univ War, well I was, when I was suddenly tackled….

"What the-"I was cut off by the who tackled me…

"Hi Misaki-neesama." I heard. Sigh… Satsuki was the one that tackled me…Figures…

"Hi Satsuki-

"Hi Misaki-neesama."

Sigh…

"Yeah, Hi s-

"Hi Misaki-neesama."

Urgghhhh….. Satsuki is trying my patience…

"Yeah, So Satsuki what were you trying to achieve when you tackled me?" I asked

"Well I was-

Satsuki was cut off by a massive explosion…. It was so big, that the ground shook for 2 seconds…

"What in the name of peaches was that?" I said as I looked at our big window, then I realized, we were already being attacked…

"Satsuki." I said. She just nodded and left…

"The War is already beginning…"

I ran as fast as I can to the garden to look for Mom…

"Mom, the War is start-"I was cut off when Mom whimpered, then I saw some water through her legs…

Oh no, she was having baby….

"**SERENE-NEESAMA!**" I yelled, I bet the whole castle heard it, but I didn't care, Mom was having labour…

"What the- Misaki, your **STILL **in the castle, we need to- "

I cut her off…

"Serene-neesama, Mom is already going through labour…"

"**WHAAAATTT!**" Serene-neesama shouted and ran beside Mom…

"Okay Mom, just breathe in and out, were going to give you to Sakura, just-just keep her inside of you for a while…" Serene-neesama said

We ran out of the castle and went to find Sakura. I tried to read her thoughts. After 30 seconds of hearing, I heard her, she was at Reiko-san's house with the others… We teleported there…

"Mo-" Amu started but when she saw us, her eyes widened and immediately called Sakura telepathically…

Sakura was beside Mom less than a second…

"Okay Mom, this is your forty-first time going through labour, so let's just go through now 'kay?"

Mom just nodded with tears already falling through her cheeks…

"Mom, 1, 2, 3, PUSH!"

"Urghhh"

"1, 2, 3, PUSH!"

"Urghhh…"

"Again Mom, PUSH!"

"AHHHHHH!"

"Mom, just push a little bit, I can already see the head... PUSH!"

"AHHHHH!"

"This time Mom one last big push, alright?, PUSH!"

"AHHHHHHHHH!"

Then the baby went out…Wait….Why isn't she crying!

"Sakura, is something wrong with the baby?" Maria asked frantically…

"No, I can't see anything wrong with her…" Sakura said, worried that the baby wasn't able to live…

Then suddenly, A voice came into our thoughts…

'_Hello, Nee-sama's, Nii-sama's."_

What the- no way

'_Yes way Misaki-neesama'_

"How do you know who I am?"

'_I have one of Mommy's talents…"_

That reminds me…

"MOM-"

What I saw horrified me…Tears suddenly began to well up through, not only mine but all of our eyes… Mom died with a smiling face, then suddenly a bright light appeared and we saw it was… DAD!

"Hi Kids, I'm going to take your Mother with me now, Life's hard without her…You better take care of your sister…" He said with that signature smirk of his…

But as he was disappearing, we all faintly heard an "I love you ", both from Dad and Mom…. I began to sob uncontrollably… Then I cried more, I suddenly realized that the baby, our new sister, will grow up with no Mother and Father… Everyone must have thought of it to.

"So…. What should we name her?" Karin said, trying to lighten our mood…

"Mikan."We all said together… Mom was actually planning to name the baby if a girl, then Mikan, but if a boy, then Natsume…

"Okay then, Mikan Hinamiro it is." Sakura said…

We were all rejoicing on Mikan's birth when suddenly we heard

"Oh… Here you are you little wenches, I'm going to **KILL YOU!**"

All of our eyes widened… The next thing I heard was a cry and All I saw was Bloody Red… I noticed I was the only one conscious… I saw the man going to stab our baby sister…

"**NOOOOOOOOO!" **

Then everything became black….

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**A/N: So what do you guys think? CONTINUE OR NOT? LIKE OR DISLIKE? CARE OR NOT CARE?**

**Continue= Review**

**NOT= Never read this**

**Like= Review**

**NOT=Ignore the story like you never read it**

**Care= Review**

**NOT= Destroy the computer…**

**For the NEKO! **

**/\_/\  
(=^.^=) ~Nya!**

**If you care for the Neko then go where the arrow leads you…**

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	2. Chapter 1: Broken and Healed

** MY ONLY REGRET**

**A/N: Hi guys again, I'm just so happy to already have 2 reviews for this story, thank you sakura-san29 and princessofspark** **for being the top 2 to write a review… It means so much to me, but I have to warn you that classes are going to be resumed on Tuesday (Philippine time please )**

**So yea, this is chapter 1 of ****_MY ONLY REGRET, please_**** enjoy **

**BY THE WAY:**

**MIKAN'S AGE= 13 years old  
NATSUME'S AGE= 14 years old  
HOTARU'S AGE= 13 years old  
RUKA'S AGE= 14 years old  
Others in class 2-B Age (except for Yuu and Otonashi) = 13 years old  
YUU'S AGE= 14 years old  
OTONASHI'S AGE= 15 years old**

**NOW READ!... PLEASE J**

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**Chapter 1: Broken and Healed**

**Year 2010**

**MIKAN'S POV**

_"Okay then, Mikan Hinamiro it is." Sakura-neesama said…_

_They were all rejoicing on my birth when suddenly we heard_

_"Oh… Here you are you little wenches, I'm going to __**KILL YOU!**__"_

_All of nee-sama's and nii-sama's eyes widened… The next thing I knew it, I cried and Misaki-neesama heard me crying and then all I saw was Bloody Red… I noticed Misaki-neesama was the only one conscious… I saw the man going to stab me then I heard…_

_"__**NOOOOOOOOO!"**_

_Then everything became black…._

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"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I cried as I woke up….

"Oh it's that dream again…Urghhh…. I've been having that dream for the past 2 weeks already..." I said as I was rubbing my eyes just to make sure that it wasn't a dream…_Oh good, it's really not a dream, phew…_

I looked at my clock,

"Hey, it's 7:50 a.m. already and it's Monday, just great (do you hear my sarcasm), Uhhhh…. Another day to start like an idiot… sigh…. I hate being an idiot… It makes me feel stupid and I hate being stupid… I guess I should start getting ready….sigh…..

I took a bath for a minute then put on my clothes for thirty seconds, and I took care of my hair for two minutes... oh look, I still have six minutes and thirty seconds to go to class, I guess I should wait in my room for six minutes, before I go to class. I'm sure everyone would think it's weird if I, Mikan 'Sakura' the no star, would be early…sigh…

While waiting for six minutes, I just remembered the reason why Mom died…sigh…Great now I feel guilty.

After thinking of that for the past six minutes, it finally reached 7:59 a.m. I just walked to the classroom, because I would have been pretty early if I ran…sigh… Great, now I keep sighing, now anyone can notice something different about me…I wonder why from all the years I'm now alive, this particular day is the day I'm going to remember the…

After thinking of those, I didn't notice that I was already in front of the door to our class…I began to turn my façade on, I smiled my idiotic smile, I guess no one was really going to know the real me…

I opened the door quietly as if I was trying to sneak in, yeah like that wasn't obvious to anyone in the class….I was struck by lightning when Jinno-sensei saw me, literally…

"Ahhh, Miss Sakura I see you're late again, detention after class, you worthless piece of junk. You're not worthy enough to be an alice just like your worthless alice…" He said with a smirk… I swear I am number one on his hate list…

Everyone just laughed and laughed and laughed…_sigh_... _ I guess I really should just get used to this_… While I was walking to my seat, somebody tripped, and the laugh grew, ever Jinno-sensei laughed… Even his evil of a frog laughed… I've had enough of this… Nobody even bothered to help me, not even Hotaru, not even Ruka, not even Natsume, not even Anna, not even Nonoko, not even Iinchou, not even Koko. They were just too busy laughing; Natsume and Hotaru are snickering; at me getting physically and mentally hurt… Well I have just have about enough of this…

"Just shut up, you sons and daughters of the devil himself (**A/N: sorry guys, promise to religion, life, parents, and friends, never say a bad word**) I can't believe I keep wasting my time with a pack of stupid nitwits who doesn't even know how to care for anyone. I'd rather be trapped inside a room full of murderers and AAO members then be stuck here for another second with you nitwits." I finally said it…what I've been wanting to say to them ever since I came here.

The sky suddenly turned bloody red and the sun couldn't even be seen. Then suddenly I heard a very familiar voice saying "_Don't Mikan, don't be a monster…"_ Then I stopped… I just tried to remember why I'm in this stupid hell hole…

I only came here to look for Hotaru, but Hotaru already is like those snotty brats, so my stay here is useless, but I have to be here for many great reasons…And running away will be just a waste of energy since I still have some business here… Do they even know how it feels to be looked down upon, when the person their look downing could kill them in less than a second? Do they even know why I always smile every single day? Do they even know why I bother to come to this place even though I already know everything that is to be learned about?

I can see that they are still in a daze that the sweet Mikan they knew actually said those things and even just dared to talk back to them, so? I do not care…

I looked at my right and I saw the window, since I didn't want to stay in this hell hole, I just walked up there then jumped, it wasn't hard at all because we were only on the seventh floor, sooo yeah…...

I made my way back to…..the sakura tree I and Natsume used to go…sigh… I think talking to **_them _**will make me feel a whole lot better… So I slept…

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**IN MIKAN'S DREAM**

**"Hey nee-sama's, nii-sama's, anyone of you there?" I asked**

**"Yeah Mikan, apparently were all here, what brings you here to talk with us? Not that we mind or anything just curious…" Rin-neesama replied…**

**"Ohhh, I just wanted to tell you my ****_beautiful day today…_****" I said with a very sarcastic manner**

**"No need to tell us Mikan, we already know, we saw it through your eyes… I'm so sorry dear, come hear." Selene-neesama said…**

**I ran to her crying, and everyone gathered around us as I said**

**"I don't want to be a monster. I don't want to let ****_that _****thing happen again. I don't want to hurt anymore…." I cried out**

**Everyone in my family looked at me with pitied, shocked, worried, and mad eyes, they were pitying me because of what I just remembered, they are shocked, because it's been one billion nine hundred ninety million, nine hundred ninety-nine thousand and nine hundred ninety-nine (1, 990,999,999) years since I cried…they are worried for my situation, and they are mad, not towards me but to my so-called ****_friends_****….. **

**"Don't worry sweetie, everything's going to be alright." Yuki-neesama told me…**

**"Please take me away from here." I sobbed harder**

**"We can't do that Mikan, you still have some business there you know, you can't defy those duties of yours but don't worry, I'm sure tomorrow, you will have a better day." Lucy-neesama told me as we grouped hug…**

**Then III stopped crying, we talked, talked and talked about what happened while I was in the human world, and they told me how they were without me. They all told me about their new discoveries, their new experiments, and everything else. I'm so lucky to have them as my nee-samas and nii-samas.**

**We all talked, talked, and talked about random stuff **

**Then suddenly, everything became blank…**

**-END-**

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I woke up from my dream… _What did Lucy-neesama mean by __**"We can't do that Mikan, you still have some business there you know, you can't defy those duties of yours but don't worry, I'm sure tomorrow, you will have a better day."**_

Sigh… I should really go back to my room, it's already seven in the evening…

I went to my room immediately; I didn't even eat my lunch and dinner…sigh…could this day get any worse…

While I was walking up to my room, I heard my classmate say

_"I can't believe that Sakura, she dares to say that to us?" __**I recognized this one; this was Per-Sumire's voice**_

_"I know right, like when she was talking to all of __**US, **__she spoke like she had authority over us…" __**one of Sumire's followers…**_

_"Yeah, does she think her useless of an alice could defeat even just one of us?" __**another one…**_

_"HA! That day would only come when someone would care for that idiot!" __**Now that stabbed me real hard…No need to emphasis my cruel life much more…**_

**_I just teleported myself to my room, not wanting to hear more of their rantings…_**

Before I went to sleep, I wrote another update in my diary… After I wrote, I noticed that after one more page, and then this will already be full… I read my other entries about…

_December 5, 2008_

_Dear Diary,_

_Today was a weird day diary ,it feels like…well…weird. Let me tell you about my day._

_It was a sunny day here in our village, when a rich family came here, and there I met this cute girl, her name's Hotaru. She's really smart diary, she can make many inventions. I noticed she was also ten years old like me. So my theory was true diary, SHE'S AN ALICE…_

_I wasn't really that shocked…We played at the park, well, I did anyway, she only ate using __**MY **__money, even though their rich… Bye diary, I'm going to sleep now. I heard that Hotaru will be leaving tomorrow for Gakuen Alice… Just great, I will finally meet…_

Hehehe, I couldn't finish this entry because I was so tired, but it is true, I did meet… but I won't write it anymore, **they** might come and haunt them…hahaha that would be hilarious, sad, awesome, and pitiful. I better sleep already tomorrow is a new day….

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-NEXT DAY-

I woke up at six in the morning since I don't need to follow this idiot act. I ate my breakfast; I took a bath, brushed my teeth, combed my hair, and then put on my clothes… I went to class already, it was just ten minutes passed six in the morning….

As I was walking down the hall, I felt happy, I don't know why though. But my happiness ended when I saw that stupid, insensitive, jerk, and pervert of a brat…

When we just passed by without saying anything, I thought that everything was going to be alright, but noooo, fate has its own plans for me…sigh….

Natsume suddenly grabbed my arm, and pushed me to the wall…

"Okay, spill it polka dots, why were you acting like a total brat yesterday, why weren't you at dinner nor at lunch yesterday, and why are you acting so different?" He said with his beautiful viscous crimson- do not go there Mikan… I shook my head mentally…

"Why do you care? You just always ignore me anyway, what difference does it make it today? Why do you suddenly 'care' for me today? You were only snickering at me yesterday when I got hurt, so why care now? You're just a snob brat like everybody in class." I said back with the same anger as his… Then I ran to the way of the classroom… To be honest I did think of him like that but that changed when I knew he was just trying to protect me and when I knew he was my 'soul mate', but what he did yesterday crossed the line. I don't care if it was a way of protecting me or just simple caring. He crossed the line…He just stood there shocked…My eyes are starting to tear up… I can't take it anymore, the one who is supposedly my 'soul mate' hates me and thinks I'm a brat…

I went inside the classroom and then we all sat down…Everyone was waiting for someone to talk but nobody did…It was so silent you could even hear a pin drop… Everyone was silent until Narumi-sensei danced inside…

"Good morning my precious students, today, we have surprisingly many new students, in fact, they might be even related to one of our very own classmate here… Please welcome our forty new students, the Sakura siblings…." Narumi-sensei said…

_Oh, I think I'm going to enjoy this day… I thought with a smirk…_

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**NATSUME'S POV**

It was just ten minutes passed six in the morning, and I already saw polka, _What in the name of hobos is she doing up so early in the morning?_

I just ignored her, thinking that we were going to do the same routine every morning but we didn't, she just passed by me like I wasn't even here… That's it I need to get my answers now that why was she acting so different yesterday, and where was she yesterday lunch and dinner….

"Okay, spill it polka dots, why were you acting like a total brat yesterday, why weren't you at dinner nor at lunch yesterday, and why are you acting so different?" I said as I grabbed her arm and pushed her to the wall…

"Why do you care? You just always ignore me anyway, what difference does it make it today? Why do you suddenly 'care' for me today? You were only snickering at me yesterday when I got hurt, so why care now? You're just a snob brat like everybody in class." She told me with the same level of anger…

Okay what she said hurt me; I never thought that she thinks I'm like that, I didn't mean to snicker at her yesterday. I was actually sad, no more than sad, I was devastated when that idiot Jin-Jin shocked the I loved… I didn't mean to let it out as a snicker…sigh…

I went back inside the classroom and saw polka, her eyes were puffy and pinkish red, why did she cry? Did I hurt her too much? I just sat down next to her …Everyone was surprisingly quiet.

Everyone was still quiet until that idiotic paedophile sensei came in…

"Good morning my precious students, today, we have surprisingly many new students, in fact, they might be even related to one of our very own classmate here… Please welcome our forty new students, the Sakura siblings…." Okay now I'm more shocked and confused… Polka has siblings? Why didn't she told me- I mean us?

Then the forty students came in…

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**A/N: So this is Chapter 1 of MY ONLY REGRET…. DO you LIKE IT or HATE IT? Well, Bye now I'm going to start updating this fic, or my other fics…ciao J**


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